Sunday 19 January 2014

Priorities

It appears to be that time of year where I need to get my priorities straight. I've just gotten my laptop back and I've been sitting in the same spot for pretty much the entire weekend except for food and to walk Oscar, which is not good, I know. I need to decided where my priorities lie because right now they are definitely not with school. Currently it seems as if they lie with the thing sitting on my lap, and that isn't Oscar either.

Do you ever just feel like the internet and the telly are the best things in the world, but also the worst? Because right now, I do. I spend my weekdays in school from 9 till 4 and everyday I come home telling myself that I'm going to do my homework straight away, or that I'm going to play with Oscar but how many times does that actually happen? Very few. Instead I'm on my tab straight away to check if the internet modem is turned on and if it is (which is the case most days) then I can guarantee you it's not homework I'll be doing or Oscar I'll be walking. It's tv shows that I'll be watching online. Namely Doctor Who, Sherlock or Supernatural. But it's not like I haven't seen them before. I can quote at least one line (and sometimes entire scenes in sync with the actors) in every episode of  Doctor Who, and I have seen a certain scene (I wont say in case of spoilers) in 'His Last Vow' of  Sherlock 6 times now. Its an obsession and it's not right.

I haven't played with Oscar, with a toy in the garden for, I'd say about 3 weeks. It's disgraceful, I know. And I can't even remember the last time I sat down with my clicker and treats in hand to actually train him something new, no matter how useless or bizarre. I don't walk him during the week because "I don't have the time", when in fact I could easilly make time to do it after school. I can't even tell you that I walk him on Friday, Saturday and Sunday when I do have the time because on more than one occasion now he has gone without a walk on any one of those days. I'm quite simply, lazy and becoming totally uninterested in Oscar. I never thought I'd ever say the latter part of that sentence and I shouldn't really have any reason to either, but I do. As a result Oscar's behaviour and training is going down the drain. Just 2 days ago he ignored all recall signals and ran away from me, out of the field and down to the road. He is less responsive to any commands on walks, even the casual ones that tell him to walk a little closer to me or to come this way not that way.
At home he is putting paws up on counters a lot more and not settling down at night. The clicker means very little to him and his recall has quite simply gone to shit.

School is very much in the same boat as Oscar as well. You'd think that I'd be trying a little more this year, given that it's 5 months until my leaving cert, the exam which will ultimately decide what I do with the rest of my life. You'd think I'd be doing some study and trying at school but I'm not. I've never really tried that hard to begin with and I've always been fine but now it's different. Now I really am not trying, and not caring and as a result school work is suffering, and suffering terribly.

So there's the question, where do my priorities really lie? It's time to cop on and make some changes I think, and soon.

3 comments:

  1. A rather belated slap wrist from a friend :D

    Coming from someone who has worked their rear end off at school to get what they did I would say dig deep for these 5 months and you will reap the rewards. However....

    School, more school, homework....... = stress

    To me you sound like you are stressed!!

    That's may be why you are not wanting to do school work or anything with Oscar.
    Things that you love just dont seem important, things go to pot, from my experience it happens when I am really stressed, then my anxiety issues sets in and then doh!! I am a mess!!

    Can you say mon-fri work butt off hard with school work (no skiving for TV and laptop - i,e weekdays are pigeonholed for school duties) and then sat and sun are off and no guilt for not doing anything except what you want to do.

    Hope you have got yourself back on track now and that you and Oscar are out having fun.

    Hows the horse riding going?

    Caz

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    1. I could spend monday-friday dedicated to school work, but I think that would prove very difficult for someone like me. I'd probably go mad! I do generally play with Oscar now after school (don't have time to get out on a walk really) and I've managed to cut back on obsessive laptop use and tv watching. (I do my homework when I get home now as oppose to jumping straight on the laptop!)

      Never really considered that it could be stress. I'm laid back, don't stress over many things at all.....or maybe I do, I'm not really sure I'd know to be honest.

      Horse riding is great. Got a back protector now which took some getting used to but it's not an issue now. Haven't fallen off (touch wood) in a long time either so thats a plus!

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  2. That used to be my plan of action, get home, clear some of the homework and then relax. It used to work for me :)

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